Return of the Cat: An Update

If I told you why we hadn't been updating Spectre's blog.... I'd have to kill you. So just take it from me, there's been an awful lot of things going on at HQ. Paint has been bought, weapons have been shined and new undercover clothes have been sewn for Operatives to wear on manoeuvres...
However...
Is it me, or do they not fit into your classic idea of undercover?

Still, I like the cut of this cat's jib!









and this has potential....



But it's not like the guys on the machine floor don't work hard, is it? So I suppose I really shouldn't complain...

Actually, why shouldn't we?

In other news:

training of the Squirrel Division is progressing well.  Indeed, they do seem to have more of a handle on Operations than we do...

These snaps were taken on recent manouevres. I would have taken photos of our chaps - who were there opponents... but they're the centre of legal action!

Until next time,
Rover and Out

Christmas at HQ

Just a short message to wish you all a merry Christmas from here at #SPECTRE HQ. 

The boss has gone off to do some top secret negotiating leaving me  - the Librarian - in charge. So it's a no holds barred celebration in true Librarian fashion.

 I've been busy trying to organise a decent celebration and was really grateful to our Allies the Daleks, who have sent us an amazing Christmas Tree.  

When I asked them about caring for this festive beauty, they said there was nothing to worry about as it will last through to the New Year with very little maintenance. Our allies even told us that said tree would self destruct if it out lived its usefulness. I just hope Rover appreciates the efforts we have gone to to make this Christmas memorable.


Our new Head of R&D, has come up with  some amazing ideas for the protection of Winter HQ. 



 

He said that no one would dare get passed the perimeter guards and that while the weather held, these guys would be low maintenance.

 But, - and maybe the pressure of command is getting to me, but 
 I'm not too sure...

 


And
 

I don't know about you, 
but a couple of these new guards are a bit see through...

Still, the  new bob sleds are so much better than the prototype, 

so, I suppose the new guy may be worth the jumper we bought him.

In other news....

I can see why the Boss isn't too impressed with the department of disguises. 

I'm really not sure who they think they're fooling...

 Still, I suppose they feel it's better than the car they gave him last year.

Well that wraps up the festive monkey business from all of us at Library.

Accounts would like to remind all you Operatives and Allies out there that due to the New Year - expenses need to be in BY THE END OF THE WEEK...
 
So until next time

Merry Christmas  

The SPECTRE Firework display

Ooh shiny and sparkly.

See the secret agents Jump and dive






See the #SPECTRE catherine wheels light up the night sky. 





Eat toffee apples and play stick the tail on the enemy agent strung up like a pinata

Drink Martinis and marvel as #SPECTRE explodes peony and dahlia effect fireworks in purples, reds and blues  to blaze across the night sky





 
Gasp as the hummers and whistles drown out the sound of gunfire at the #SPECTRE  underwater base and bring splendour to the light show above

Be dazzled as the blues of the bengal and horsetail fireworks highlight the futile attempts of 007 to take us unaware

 

Run for cover as the grand finale to the fireworks display accidentally sets off the ammunition dump at the edge of the compound.

PS - It  came to light, in the inevitable cleanup that always follows a good party, that our younger Operatives decided that as they were good at turning university loans into vodka, they should try the same trick with water...

Needless to say - DRUNKEN PIRANHA ARE NO USE TO ANYONE.

Rest assured,  HEADS HAVE ROLLED

Until Next time

Rover and Out...

Cometh the Hour, Returneth the Cat

I am reliably informed that Saturday sees the return of the hour that was stolen from me earlier in the year. It took long enough to lobby the Powers that Be for its return and I am glad to say I have their assurance that they won't be removing it again for the foreseeable future. They had better not. I do not like time being messed around with.. Especially by amateurs 
.
But as we approach the anniversary of our First Year on Twitter,  it behoves me, as Head of SPECTRE to ask some vital questions like:

 What have we achieved?

 

Well we have established that we are capable of taking over the world. See our website for details

 We have achieved a few bloopers - the admissions of the Kennedy shootings and the Titanic sinking spring to mind. And we have some key alliances - most notably the Daleks, the Dragons @DrBizarro and @Captain Limey. I do not class our alliance with Locutus of Borg as ratified

 Why are we here?

That's an easy one to answer - some allies and Operatives  (they know who they are) insisted on publishing erroneous data which necessitated a move. Initially I thought to encourage Heads to Roll but hey I quite like the new place...

 Why doesn't #Operationweekend start earlier and last longer?

A tough one. There's not a time continuum big enough to deal with the excitement? Possibly.
But mainly because our ally @Poringlandoak tells us their cellar isn't large enough to handle any more booze. When R&D can get their act together, then I suggest that we put them on the task of organising a larger cellar... 

Ok I said when. Perhaps I should say if...


Because there is a really burning question....

JUST WHAT ARE R&D UP TO THIS TIME?

Until Next Time...

Rover and Out

Careless tweets CAUSE MEMOS

.
ALL OPERATIVES AND ALLIES PLEASE NOTE: 

Due to a careless tweet from our normally well organised and efficient Ally @Mrcnessna -our new HQ (We've only been here a few days remember) resembles a high tec' car forecourt.

What did he do wrong? 

 Did heads roll?

You may well ask.....

He rashly pointed out that Blofeld - he who thinks he runs #SPECTRE  - had got VW's. Well that was enough for Purchase and Aquisitions. With a total disregard for the sensibilities of the Accounts Department, they go out and spend, what can only be described as a LUDICROUS amount of money!

Rest assured we are dealing with the issue. But it will be a slow and calculating time ahead.



Fortunately for all  there are dogs in desperate need of a place to sing.

And we are currently interviewing for an Arthur Daleyesque   figure to remove our  unwanted and surplus car issue.

I have received a  CV from this character - if anyone can vouch for him. We will hire him immediately...

 

Until then, 

Rover and Out

HQ moving Part 2

 
For those of you who are always convinced that life as a cat  in charge of #SPECTRE is easy, you need to know that moving your top secret HQ is not a barrel of laughs. For starters, what do you do with your warplanes? Do you fly them? And if you do, do you move them in daylight or undercover of darkness?
 
Once you've dealt with the fighter pilots and their craft, you need to decide how to move the fire engines. And remember that's an entirely different kettle of fish. Which reminds me - what did we do with the fish tank?

 And once the hardware has been relocated you have to move your personnel. And that's where it gets interesting.  You see getting the boxes and labeling them is the easy part. Even  adding the essential words TOP Secret and adding the chains isn't beyond the wit of most operatives.

 But after that, oh boy does it get difficult.  For a start, how do you stop your Operatives getting in the boxes. REMEMBER We're an outfit of cats. And once we've got them in, how do you get them out again? Option one - ring a bell? Nah that won't work we're not a dog. And besides they don't know how to get in the box in the first place.

 Option two put up the following sign - and watch them scatter.

Of course, now that we've had the Olympics you could always try running a race. And some cats will - of course - oblige.

However, whatever you don't don't let a cat  near the bubble wrap...

 Or those strange white polystyrene things. 





And whatever you do, don't forget the toilet roll